Thrill
by Sakanda
Summary: He's shivering from the pure thrill of it because finally, /finally/, Gary is kissing him. Shounenai Gary/Ash ShiShi


**Title: **Thrill

**Author:** Sakanda.

**Fandom:** Pokemon (ambiguous)

**Pairing:** Gary/Ash; [Satoshi/Shigeu; ShiShi]

**Rating:** PG-13

**Genre:** Romance; TWT

**Warnings:** Homoeroctic relations (haha), present tense narrative

**A/Ns:** I finally got around to fixing this up a bit, though I ended up giving a little more of a make-over than I'd originally had in mind. I feel more satisfied with it though. Also, if you are reading it again, I changed some of the details after seeing a wonderful gary/ash gif, and I was like, "oh snap yes that plays out perfectly to how I want it!" I bow to feranelia's supreme talent

I would link you but is HORRIBLE and won't let me sobsob if you ask for the link I'll send it to you~

**Thrill.**

"Gary, what are you-"

He's cut off as he inhales abruptly, his back hitting the wall. Gary walks closer - stalks closer - and his eyes are glinting, like some kind of merciless predator. Then he is growling, almost purring, low in his throat, and Ash changes his mind, deciding that no, Gary's eyes are shining much more like a cat in heat.

"Ash…" His name is said softly, almost an exhale, an afterthought, and as Gary's hand slides along the wall to settle up above Ash's head, he's leaning in close, peering down through and pinning him with those half-lidded eyes. Ash shudders, though not because he's afraid, but because he's… intimidated. Intimidated and just a bit turned on.

"Ash, I…" He's whispering, in that deep, throaty voice Ash only gets to hear when he's issuing challenges. His eyes are smoldering, and his breath is hitching, and he's close - so close, almost touching, his body almost brushing along his own, and all Ash can think about is how warm he is, and how hot Gary is, because he can feel the body heat just rolling off of the taller boy in waves.

Ash is pressing back against the wall, his damp palms flat on its surface. He's closing his eyes, because Gary's just so close, and all he can smell is him. It's kind of like sweat and cut-grass, and that sterilized scent of a lab, and while Ash would never have thought of that combination as pleasant before this; now, with Gary, on Gary, it's perfect, and he's wondering why he'd never considered it sooner.

His eyes are closed, but he's just so _aware_ of Gary. Of him towering over him, of his crisp breath ruffling his hair and ghosting along his face, and of how close they are, really are, their chests only scant inches apart.

So he opens his eyes, but regrets it soon after; because while before he knew Gary was there, now Ash _knows _Gary is there, and it seems like it's all he knows. He is looking up into those eyes, those shining, gleaming eyes that just make him want to strip down to nothing and offer up everything.

But then he has to fight to keep them open, because the visual that comes on the tail-end of that thought is almost too overpowering, and his knees are already weak and he doesn't know if he can take much more of this.

He tries to open his mouth to say Gary's name, to say anything, but his throat is so constricted and parched that nothing comes out.

But then he doesn't have to worry about talking, because suddenly Gary's lips are covering his own, brushing softly, then more insistently against them. Gary's hand is reaching up and cupping the back of his head, fingers sliding gently through his hair before Gary's tongue suddenly darts out, running along his mouth, hesitant and wet, lapping inquisitively at the corners. He runs it along the seam of Ash's lips, before making a shallow thrust in between, begging entrance. Ash gasps in surprise - his head spinning, his thoughts heavy - and Gary takes that as permission as his tongue breaches past Ash's pliant lips, and abruptly, suddenly, perfectly, Gary's in him. His tongue is slick and wet, and he tastes sharp and flat all at once, and Ash forgets how to breathe because it feels wonderful, incredible, amazing - exactly, yet still nothing like how he's always imagined it.

He's shivering from the pure thrill of it because finally,_ finally_, Gary is kissing him. His eyes are stretched wide in amazement, pupils blown, his thoughts sluggish and unable to command his body into action - his own tongue into participating - because Gary is_ finally kissing _him. And he never would have thought it could have been this mind-blowingly, heart-stoppingly, fantastically good, no matter how many times he's dreamt about it.

But then, suddenly, Gary is pulling away. His face is flushed with shame and guilt, and Ash should be protesting, telling Gary that he's trembling in excitement not shock, that he's breathless in ecstasy not horror, but he can't focus enough to form those words _because_ he is so breathless and dazed, and floored, and thrilled, and Gary just looks too sexy and adorable when he's blushing.

So Ash is surprised when Gary turns from him and reaches toward the door. It takes him a moment to collect his thoughts and connect the pieces, to rush forward and throw his arms around Gary's torso and halt him from leaving.

His heart is hammering in his chest, and his face in pressed up against Gary's back, because he knows this is_ it_, the moment, his only chance, and whatever he says or does, or doesn't do, his whole future with Gary is all riding on these few seconds. The very thought of Gary walking away again, being in his life only distantly, only as an acquaintance he once knew when they were children terrifies him, and he can't help the tremors that run up and down his body. And he's so frightened by the idea of Gary knowing his secret, _the_ secret, yet still walking away, still rejecting him, that he pulls away, pressing his palms to his eyes in an attempt to hold back his fears, shoulders hunching in around himself.

"I… Gary, I love you." His voice is muffled into his hands, and since even Ash heard the quiver in his voice, he's sure Gary did as well. He's too scared to look up and see Gary's face - too ashamed to give voice to the sob that's caught in his throat. He doesn't know what to do, because he said it, _he said it_, and he isn't suppose to say it, not now, and maybe not ever. That familiar weight of contrition in his gut just seems to coil tighter, heavy with the usual feelings of shame for his depravity and his cowardice. It doesn't matter what he does now, he's lost Gary for good, because though Gary was kissing him, it must have been completely physical, he's never felt that away about Ash, despite Ash harboring these unnatural feelings. And it hurts, it hurts so much it's hard to breathe, because Gary isn't just his rival, but his friend, his best fucking friend, and now Ash has destroyed all that, and he just can't seem to stop shaking because Gary will never smile at him again, or challenge him again, or give him advice or call him childish names or explain things for him and wait until he actually understands before calling him an idiot, or —

But then he can feel Gary's arms encircling him, pulling him in close, and it takes barely a split second for him to return the embrace. He can feel a puff of breath on the back of his neck and then the curl of Gary's mouth against his skin, before the other boy is pulling back slightly, and his breath moves to dust along his face instead. It takes a moment before Ash is reluctantly unburying his face from the other boy's shoulder, and after a beat, manages to squint open his eyes, his heartbeat thrumming in his throat and blood rushing in his ears.

And then Ash lets out the breath he doesn't even know he was holding, because Gary is still smiling, and its a smile he's never seen on the other boy; small, delicate, fragile and the most beautiful thing Ash has ever seen, and while he knows it's girly, and childish, and immature, he thinks he just might start to cry.

"Geez Ash, you're such an loser," Gary whispers fondly, a warm emotion dancing in those gleaming eyes. Ash grunts, and reaches up to wipe away the start of tears, embarrassed, but Gary's hand stops his halfway, and instead the other boy is bending down once more, and kissing him.

And once again, Ash is just wordlessly, breathlessly, and absolutely thrilled.

_Fin._

A/Ns: What did you think? Any feedback is absolutely delightful to hear! The kindle to my writing fire!


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